im alive

just came back from grocery shopping for saturday's workshop. not only do i facilitate,organise but i also buy the groceries. never like wearing uniform in public much, makes me stand out from the crowd what with my tall,imposing frame and all.alright so i'm tremendously lightweight but i am big and wear size 10 shoes.

whenever i enter a coffeeshop with the uniform i get more than my fair share of glances from wary stallowners. ok so its because i look like a bloody ministry of health cleanliness checker...haha...they should give me more fishballs then.

i am scared. had shivers down my spine. was queing up at macdonald's and had to order a cheeseburger without pickles meal for my friend. only problem is macdonalds doesn't have a cheeseburger meal.

me(sweet smile): you have cheeseburger meal?
counter girl: no, student only, you got student pass.
(i was in uniform by the way, pretty obvious no)
me: no. aiyah can lah right?

now this is the part which scared me, she started smiling sweetly at me.its not any normal salesgirl i want your $ smile ok. i have no recollection what she looks like except that she's fat,has a lotta makeup and isn't chinese.

counter girl: ok. you want ten meals?
me: huh? what?
counter girl now with a freaky smile: i mean you want ten meals i will also give you. with more free fries and coke.
me: uh no need, one enough. thanks.

urgh.i swear even my mcflurry she made for me was overflowing from the amount she put in. i quickly scampered off out of sight.

have been persistently called by old friends recently. exams over, looking for job, clearing leave in NS, bored, single, lonely, sore throat. oh wait the last one is me. yeah throat hurts and not really suitable to chat but what can i say, their friends after all. besides its nice to chat amidst my yawning and the fact i get scolded for switching off my h/p promptly at 1830h to get away from the world. only switch it on at ten to realise they tried to call me. well could've been worst ^=^

gavin poured silver metal at 8:28 PM. |

the worn out weary traveller

am exhausted on my last legs, its interesting that no matter how much people type on blogs, it'll always slip into something depressing or about issues, its always easier to lament/complain than to type about something cheerful.

sitting at home typing this entry, didn't feel like asking anyone out this weekend, partly in due to the hole in my wallet and the tiring activities i had these week. anyway with my neither "here nor there" status on uni, the mood i got is seriously not going to be much entertainment to any of my friends.

no doubt i aced that interview hands down but nothing's confirmed until its on black and white in paper and signed,sealed,delivered.so that's left me in the doldrums waiting and waiting again.........

went exploring orchard with a friend who came back from brunei the other night. its really good to have him back, plannin to watch kill bill with him too.
strangely all my schooling hangouts are like hmmm gone? but these were hangouts 3-4 years ago so yeah times change. the annexe at heeren is like all boarded up and far east is like well....just more run down.but it felt good walking from takashimaya to heeren to cineleisure to far east and finally ending at borders.

im crazy on bags, need a new bag for uni but gotta resist for awhile more. but i still cant help running into every bag shop i come across. really drooled over a leather sling that matched my shoes! 2 shades of leather!22bucks!

went t ocheck out the new ZARA outlet at great world city, oh my, the clothes are fantastically cool and laidback. nearly wanted to break my NETs card for fear of falling into mindless shopping. am 100% getting a full ensemble there next round i get some $$!

plans have been going well with organising my friend's guest list for his 21st birthday.quite touched by the sms he sent me when i gave him an update. have so far gotten 10pple from my end, it is kinda hard to recontact pple after so long, at least those i did still remember me.haha.

Thanks man...U are just so wonderful. It's my fortune and pleasure. really really appreciate ur great help esp during tis time im so busy...thank u once again!

too bad i can't leave my h/p off while im in the doldrums, not only will i miss smses like this but also this

Hey..can ya help me write a recommend letter?my med interview on monday.

that would be a community service testimonial which i've been doing for students.so yeah i made some quick calls and the prospective doctor is getting it on monday, provided i finish typing it out for him later.heh i wish him good luck for it.hmm dont think i'll get a touching sms from him though.

this is gonna sound dark but all this altruism makes me remember the horrible and dumb things ive done even more.it like pierces me everytime my mind recollects it.but that's another matter.

for now ive got another busy week. 3 pronged approach:ns,friend's birthday,volunteer training workshop. seeking solace and blissful ignorance in these.

gavin poured silver metal at 4:38 PM. |

tellycrap and balls

tennis balls that is. there i was eating my noodles and sipping my coffee not caring much while my break buddies were talking about getting a tennis court. they were lamenting when one guy suggested bedok, that was like the other side of the island. then it struck me, i had one across the road. the lightbulb struck, not that i booked it in like 4 years....

wasn't half as bad as i feared, but we did spend a third of the time picking up balls. not to mention a slight hangover from the beer and lack of sleep from the night before. backhand wasn't bad and they liked the condo facilities. makes me wonder why i don't use them at all when its just across the road and is free. hmmm.

i swear television is getting crappier. just switched off the telly, cringing at Eye for a Guy. No doubt Rachel looks hot but she's practically bland like kosong prata. not to mention the guys, their just whining and whimpering on national tv. catching a little bit of tv here and there, i can't even bear to see the trailer of Angel, it reeks of a hash-mash script made to look like a long emotional story, i mean come on already, Angel has a half vampire son? get a life please....a full life.either that or u deserve to get slayed by Buffy.

caught some FHM bikini heaven, bikini hell more like it. I mean shaggy to judge, that guy cant even talk straight. well at least its better than Are You Hot? screw lorenzo lamas, he's way past his prime, baked prime ribs at least 10years ago.

nothing beats old favourites, caught a bit of "Family Matters", an old show starring a then 20-year old Michael J. Fox. now that's a solid script and fine ass acting for you. laughed my head off Everybody loves Raymond, and the Simpsons. Cosby was good til it got too sloppy and emotional. they should have cut it off there and then.

i caught husky and starch! oops i mean starsky and hutch. haha got that from the guy next door. my first movie of 2004 wasnt so bad i guess, other than the fact i was praying my bladder would hold, being caught in the middle of a really packed row, i enjoyed the movie. last time i was in the middle i had to climbover seats to go to the little boys' room.

been having a bit of difficulty sleeping, guess that what happens when your brain is inactive for too long, it forgets the sleep function as well. although my life does seem more active than most NS guys, it was just plain blah this past weekend. other than blowing $$ on another pair of Doc Martens i couldn't resist, i went rat hunting.

it was Splinter! the sensei from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. agreed to follow my dad cause he knew nuts about the story. seems like my little cousin had the house (79.90 freaking bucks) and just lacke the rat to fill it up for them to fight and make merry. spent some time poring over a LOTR sword at the Metro toy section though, it was cute, shake it and it makes a slicing sound. haha.

agreed to help an old friend have some sort of class reunion, makes me wonder why i bothered though. i can just imagine the difficulty in sending the invitations let alone rsvp listings. oh well, tis a refreshing change, besides i need the mental exertion badly. it just doesnt seem enough to do work8-6, skip lunch, get gastric, do volunteer management and spend time with family. phew.

it was a terrifying trip to the dentist, my 1st in like 1.5years. the drills, the blood, the hole finding. i flinched once like a baby when the drill (or was it polisher) virbrated a nerve. i swear a bead of cold sweat came down my back. turned out i didn't have a single hole despite all the sweets and caffeine. weee guess not eating chocolate really helps after all.

ah, work's crazy and only 70 days left to go. i had like 20emails to clear today and thats just the tip of the iceberg. gives me great sadistic pleasure to announce "sigh i only got 70days left...how to take it..." to the those with at least a year left. guess there's a sadist streak in me after all.*snicker*

gavin poured silver metal at 10:26 PM. |

workaholic blues

been working my ass off but feeling completely drained the past few days. problem is, i wanna keep working but there's really nothing much to do at home.not to mention the heat wave going around, even my poor puss can't move around much to chase the ball i roll for him.

dunked a whole cup of sugar cane juice over dinner. didn't get a single sip of water since 2, realised it only over dinner. got to start carrying around a IV drip at this rate.

seriously making an effort to see my first movie of 2004'.problem is, everyone's seen hellboy already. yeah yeah its a cheesy b-grade comic flick but i'm desperate ok? damnit can't u guys wait for me for once. now my next target is starsky and hutch.

the only constant thing i do when i'm at home is just play music and doze off eventually.not bad when u got XXk of hifi systems around the house. i'm not a fan of music piracy nor latest pop thrash so i'll make a list of cds i bought through extensive research and listening at the testing stations recently.

five for fighting: the battle for everything
man, this is an awesome cd. fell for it immediately hook,line and sinker. slow and fast numbers equally good. if i could have an alarm clock with track 9 to get me out of bed i would!am eagerly waiting their 3rd album.

best of hootie and the blowfish
played this through my friend's car as he gave me a lift back. "vintage stuff!" he exclaimed. yep it is vintage. love their voices, plenty of soul and not just a sweet thingy ripping off lyrics doing other singers' covers.

alison krauss: forget about it
absolutely angelic saccharine voice. she's country but this is her only foray into pop about 5years back. my dad describes her voice as "effortless".

martina mcbride: best of
the song "concrete angel" from seraphim's blog got stuck in my head for a long time and it took me a long time to find the cd with the song. she's popular in the states and has a more upbeat swinging fast paced country pop style.

seal: seal
seal's debut album. 10years later and i bought it.took me a long time to find this one too. really classic easy listening brit style. starts of slow, builds up and he has a cool smooth voice.

sarah mclachlan(2): surfacing and fallen
actually i got all of sarach mclachlan's studio cds. there's one unplugged i haven't bought yet. surfacing has her hit "angel" and fallen's the latest cd. nice beats to accompany her soulful voice. fallen's faster paced and a more studio sythesized accompanients though.

i think my cd collection has exceeded a 100, excluding the hundreds my dad has.popular hangouts for my exploration include "that cd shop" at great world city, gramophone at specialist shopping centre and city hall. as well as a few little known specialised cd shops.

met a coupla old friends recently at a birthday bash. has it been that long already? 9 years of knowing each other? made me feel kinda guilty for being too focused in my own activities and ignoring to find out more about them. not to mention the rejections to meet up.

meeting up with them realised i'm a total disaster at describing my life.definitely not a normal 20yr old NS guy going onto uni.

watched american idol?
huh finalists already ah..wah didn't know leh
survivor?
what richard's gone? when?!$@@!
how's the driving?
uh dunno still slowly learning
watched any movies recently?
uh no, no time
last club you went to?
uh....don't think so, maybe embassy but it was empty.
how was your last ippt/shooting/army related crap test?
uh don't have, i navy
your girlfriend how is she?
wtf...no....me single happy-go-lucky forever
what u do normally?
classified navy work, volunteer management (blank stare). that's the point i go back to my wine.

couldn't make it for a friend's b.day party so called up to at least apologise.
chatted a bit and the same excerpt gets stuck in my head.

she: so what r u busy with?
me: umm NS and volunteering
she: oh still volunteering? i shall always remember you for all the work you put into it.

same reaction from meeting another friend's mum. oh your so good so....etc etc

urgh i'm supposed to feel big headed about my nobility right? truth is sometime's i don't know what to think. is it normal to lose focus of the goals and yet be driven by the sense of purpose all the time? no matter all the work or seeminglyr "good work" i do in this world it doesn't in any way make me a better person. there's still some stuff i'm ashamed of and for a guy with a good memory it'll be stuck in my head for a long long time.

went exploring the new biopolis behind MOE, while dragging my friend on the pretext of searching for the food court in the scorching heat. poor guy was wearing sandals and had blisters on his feet by the time we were done. guess people with long legs are mostly good walkers, with boots!

the Biopolis is a nice place, really well designed with interlinked walkways, greenery and fengshui elements but it led me to think that with all the worl class facilities are we really prepared with the brainpower? the singaporeans going to work there are fresh life science graduates and its our first foray into it. we got tons of catching up to do in comparison to European countries. a lot of effort and $$ really has to go into the biopolis as a life science hub.

for now i'll concentrate on social issues rather than science thank you very much.

gavin poured silver metal at 8:27 PM. |

of wine and women and the duracell bunny

i'm the duracell bunny walking around with the big drum.haha cute advertisement since my childhood days, really like that pink bugger with the drum
.
why duracell? its how my colleague described me, running up and down from 8am to 6pm then rushing off for social work stints. only reason why i'm blogging now is because the office computer is finally stable and my bosses are at a meeting.

coming back home after on average 14hours out really takes a toll on the energy level. thank god i'm still healthy but am concussed at 1045pm.been meaning to blog for awhile but too much stuf going on.

women......i'm like the pivot of uncle agony in my office. they complain to me, among themselves and me. sighez that's what you get for being or rather trying to be a nice guy. i swear all women have mood swings, its good to be a happy single. i recently made plans that if i don't achieve what i want by 30, i'm off to bible college. a priest can be rich, be loved by all, and have as many goddaughters as he wants.

i got a new phone!!! new plan!!! problem is i can't use the new line yet. scrolling through my list i cannot fathom the thought of smsing over 100pple that i changed number. not to mention my boss has taken a keen liking to calling me at 1645 to wait for him to come back to the office at 1730 to START WORK.

the change of phone was essential. or so i like to myself to think so. was supposed to go to an ex-classmate's birthday party the other day but got held up in town. problem is, my friend wanted to go with me as he didn't know anyone else there. my sms never reached him so an hour before the party he called with an irate voice. oops. luckily his party is next on my list and i swore to him to attend it.i blame the biggest telco in singapore.

had my first taste of XO the other day, a boss' retirement. rancid stuff, nearly puked at the first sip.but with everyone drinking away i had no choice. so.....i ordered lime juice and for the rest of the night was secretly pouring the XO into it. XO lime juice ain't bad, but i'm sticking with beer the rest of my life.

got a weird call the other day on my handphone.

caller: Hi, is this XX difang (place)
me: huh, you looking for who? this is gavin
caller: XX difang
then the reality struck me, i think i exploded, it was an inopportune time.
me: she me difang, wo shi yi ge ren ah,zhe shi wo handphone (what place, i'm a person ah, this is my handphone)
caller: she me (what)
me: da cuo le lah, sala sala (wrong number in mandarin and hokkien)

despite my smattering of mandarin, i think she got the message.

was holding social work interviews. ended all of them on a light note by asking how old they thought i was. out of 20 only 1 guessed correctly. OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I DO NOT LOOK 29. I WANNA GET MARRIED BY 30 AND IF I'M 29 I'M NOWHERE NEAR THAT! the average evened out is 25.

back to life.

gavin poured silver metal at 9:59 AM. |